SOMETIMES I’M IN MY HEAD SO LONG & WHEN YOU GET HERE IT FEELS LIKE A DISRUPTION
My lover tells me the moment I
cross the threshold of her door.
Outside a man yells the price of produce
while all above like pen marks
upon a sheet of colored paper
birds traverse the infinite paths that connect
where they are to where they’re going
with an ease I’ve only seen
in a drunk man stumbling toward
a piss’ pain-free release.
I am trying to hold on to each small
almost forgotten orb of my grace
until someone takes it from me.
When you kiss me often
it feels like the tongue in my mouth
has assumed the weight & shape
of a bear’s lung. It takes
such great stamina to bear
the pain of this world
while forever holding out on the momentary
possibility of a scream. Clutch me
like you mean it. Don’t be
so timid. It’s not like you
to want without wanting, to listen to
the faint tune disrupting your head
& not find within it
a melody.
I have an idea.
I’m sick of birds & I think
we might be better than their
twirling-all-innocent-&-not-giving-a-fuck.
I’ve been holding in my small, just created womb
a thimble of happiness. It looks
like jello you just shot a bullet through.
It’s quite literally an explosion of color,
like a flower dropped acid & tried
to make a baby with another flower.
You can have it.
I’ve never known
quite what to do with it
& I know you’re having
a hard time believing in anything
other than yourself anymore.
So take it. Drink up! Even the trees
grow weary waiting
for you to climb them & shoo
these pesky birds away.
|